Be Nervous When Things Are Too Quiet
No news may mean bad news – Issue #37
As an introvert, there’s nothing better than being left alone to do your thing. No one is bothering you, or talking to you, and you can simply focus on your work every day. Ahhhhhh!
Even after decades of a career that benefited from frequent discussions, collaboration, and partnerships, I still easily slip into a state of comfortable solitude. I turn off my phone, and I’m happy that I’m being left alone.
No news is good news, right?
But, as I discovered early in my career, no news can be bad news. As an employee, if you’re not being kept in the loop, considered, or remembered, that’s bad.
It’s actually really bad.
As a leader, your silence is damaging.
As an entrepreneur, a quiet business is a dying business.
When silence isn’t golden
If you’re ambitious, silence isn’t golden. Why? You may be hungry for the promotion path, but that isn’t going to happen if people aren’t actively engaging with you. If you aren’t being kept in the loop, there is may be one or more reasons for concern.
Your input isn’t valued or deemed necessary. Otherwise, you’d be asked for it.
Your boss is assuming that you’re doing your job. But, he or she is probably assuming that you’re doing less than you actually are. A lot less.
Your boss is assuming that you’re happy and satisfied with your current role, salary, etc. You are not a squeaky wheel, so things must be ok.
Sometimes you are being considered for a layoff list. That silence may reflect how uncomfortable people are with that knowledge and they can’t face you.
Something big and bad is coming. The people who know are afraid they’ll spill the beans, so they’re avoiding people they don’t trust with that knowledge.
People don’t trust you. Let’s face it. Many human beings like to gossip, complain, or hypothesize about the future of the company. People aren’t sharing this with you because they don’t know if they can trust you.
People don’t like you. Work isn’t a popularity contest. But, likable people, funny people, and popular people do reap the benefits of the system. Hate the game if you want, but moving up is harder when people think that you’re not friendly and avoid small talk with you.
You’re not viewed as a team player. No one wants to bother you, seek you out, or work with you.
Things are always in motion. Change is a constant. Just because you’re not hearing about it, doesn’t mean that it isn’t happening. Silence simply means that you won’t be prepared for what is coming.
If you’re not talking with your manager about your plans and ambitions, he or she isn’t going to magically think of you and assume that you’re ready for a promotion. In fact, he or she may assume that you don’t even want a promotion.
What can you do?
I’m sorry, my fellow introverts. This proposal is going to sound like a nightmare.
You need to regularly come out of your cave and talk with people. You can’t always wait for them to come to you, because there may be valid reasons that it isn’t already happening.
You need to take control of your career and that means that you don’t wait for things to happen to you. You make things happen for you. Data gathering, awareness, and preparation are critical for you to make this happen.
Basic steps you can take immediately:
Identify who seems to have their finger on the pulse of the company. They always seem to know when a change is coming. Make time to chat with this person on a regular basis. Don’t be a machiavellian narcissist, though. Have a genuine friendly chat, be honest that you’ve noticed that he or she seems to know what’s going on in the company, and acknowledge how you admire that.
Engage with your colleagues. Yes, I know. You enjoy your cave. But, you need to give value to receive value. Share what you learn, be a sounding board for others, provide constructive feedback, and be proactive with your support. It sounds like more work, doesn’t it? Yep, it is. But, you’re not going to get promoted for doing less work and being less visible.
Set up regular one-on-one time with your manager. I can’t believe that I have to suggest this, but I have discovered a surprisingly large number of people who never have regular meetings with their managers. Shame on those managers, but you can’t wait for your manager to do the right thing. Remember that no news is bad news, and this is especially true when it comes to your boss.
Early in my career, I discovered that my manager was only aware of about 30% of the work I was actually doing. It could have killed my performance review.
Luckily, I caught it early enough to set the story straight and bring him up to speed on everything I was doing across a variety of projects. He was surprised, and it completely changed my upcoming annual review.
Don’t assume that your hard work is noticed. Don’t expect that your manager is aware of everything you’re doing. Don’t wait for him or her to engage with you.
Take ownership of the communication that needs to happen, and don’t be lazy and handle it all through email or Slack. When it comes to understanding how you’re performing, how the company is doing, and if a change is in the wind, nothing beats a face-to-face conversation.
As a leader
If you’re in a leadership position, you are viewed as the distributor of news from the top down. Your silence can be just as destructive, but the ripple effects are larger.
No news is bad news for you as well. Some employees may assume that all is well if they aren’t hearing anything from you. However, many are going to fill in the blanks.
The team knows that you’re not just sitting quietly at your desk, twiddling your thumbs. At least, I hope that isn’t the case.
They know that you’re in meetings with senior leadership and privy to information that they are not. You know the plans. You know what’s coming.
When you aren’t talking with the team, some may assume the worst. Why? Because that’s something they’ve experienced before. We all have. Things get too quiet and then the big reveal is made. A big re-org. A huge shift in the corporate strategy. Or, a surprise layoff.
Don’t leave them in the dark.
Sometimes you can’t share everything you know, so be honest and tell them that. I’ve shared the information that I could with my team, and then literally said, “I can’t share additional details right now. It’s being kept confidential until later.”
Will they be thrilled? No.
However, they’ll be happier with that vs. assuming the worst. They will wish that you’d tell them more, but they will also be glad to know that their boss is in the loop. You’d be surprised how often people will interpret silence to mean that you aren’t part of the decision making that’s clearly happening in the company.
“If our boss isn’t even part of those discussions, we must be screwed”
Breaking the silence
Tell the team what you can. Don’t withhold information out of some obscene abuse of power.
Let the team know when there is information that you can’t share vs. dodging their questions or faking an answer to make people feel better (e.g., “Oh no, we would never have a layoff here”).
Keep the team regularly updated on progress. Sometimes all you can say is that nothing is settled yet, meetings and discussions are still going on, and that’s ok. It’s better than having people assume that a decision has been made or that something even worse is happening.
Check the pulse of your team. Ask how they are doing and actively solicit questions. Get ahead of it vs. hiding at your desk hoping no one will ask you anything.
Stay in the loop
It is peaceful and pleasant to quietly focus on doing your work. However, if you’re constantly being left alone, it could mean that something is off.
If you’re ok with just doing your job, day in and day out, and never getting promoted, then keep on keeping on.
If you’re ok with being put on the surprise layoff list, then enjoy your peace and quiet until HR and Security show up at your desk.
However, if you are the ambitious sort who enjoys promotions, you do want your boss to be aware of everything you are doing. Also, you want colleagues to see you as a valuable team member. Finally, you want to be aware of big changes that are happening in the company, so you need to step away from your desk occasionally.
Invest in your interactions with your colleagues and your boss, just as much as you do in the hard skills and knowledge you need for your work. You can think of this as an investment in developing your emotional intelligence (EQ). Your EQ will often have just as large of an influence on your career path as your hard skills do.
“Even if you are a solo bench engineer coming up with a better widget, no one will pay attention to you unless you can communicate, persuade, and excite people about that widget — and that takes emotional intelligence.” — Daniel Goleman, Ph.D.
Quick Tip
I’m sure that you enjoy working with some colleagues more than others. You probably have a few people at work you spend personal time with, while there are some coworkers you tend to avoid.
It’s normal human behavior to maximize your time around pleasant people and minimize your time with people you find irritating or annoying. However, I’m certain that you’re familiar with this quote.
“Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer.” ― Niccolò Machiavelli
I’m certainly not saying that you have enemies at work. I’m also not implying that you should think of unpleasant people as enemies.
However, I’ve learned that I need to work extra hard to communicate frequently with people I may not like as much as others. It’s easy to spend time with your friends and pleasant people at work (e.g., grabbing coffee and lunch together every day).
It’s much harder to connect with people I don’t think of as friends (or friendly). But, those working relationships are often quite important to your success. Plus, I often found that those relationships improved when we spent more time together, although we had tended to avoid each other in the past.
My tip for you is to schedule regular meetings and coffee chats with the most challenging people you have to work with at the office. The benefits are numerous. You will be better informed and your relationships with these people will often improve.
Worst case? You will at least know what they are doing and planning, and you’ll have the opportunity to update and inform them about your activities and plans as well. This is much better than letting gossip and misunderstandings derail your working relationship.
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